i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
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You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
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Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
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