i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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