So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
