You're completely useless in the revolution.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
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