So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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