her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Randomize
