Texts From Last Night

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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.

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  (604): I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was. http://tfl.nu/96eh
  Replies (21) Good night (880) Bad night (6276)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain

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  (302): I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain http://tfl.nu/18xp
  Replies (22) Good night (1351) Bad night (4308)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12

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  (513): you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12 http://tfl.nu/a1h6
  Replies (44) Good night (6749) Bad night (2744)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?

  (1-502): View more from Kentucky

  eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.

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  (502): So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut? (1-502): eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material. http://tfl.nu/j1ps
  Replies (19) Good night (5107) Bad night (1206)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.

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  (561): The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy. http://tfl.nu/an4v
  Replies (30) Good night (2263) Bad night (6327)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....

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  (609): just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public.... http://tfl.nu/rq3r
  Replies (24) Good night (7731) Bad night (2119)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.

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  (303): I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate. http://tfl.nu/1fh9
  Replies (23) Good night (1206) Bad night (5510)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.

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  (678): I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities. http://tfl.nu/k0mm
  Replies (12) Good night (3018) Bad night (845)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.

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  (907): You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield. http://tfl.nu/kh6y
  Replies (7) Good night (2113) Bad night (1238)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better

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  (479): I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better http://tfl.nu/bldt
  Replies (7) Good night (2593) Bad night (766)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...

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  (614): not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin... http://tfl.nu/5fas
  Replies (29) Good night (3113) Bad night (944)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.

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  (734): The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake. http://tfl.nu/3nh1
  Replies (2) Good night (1225) Bad night (815)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body

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  (440): I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body http://tfl.nu/gs9m
  Replies (7) Good night (1552) Bad night (569)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.

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  (412): You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ. http://tfl.nu/sfn0
  Replies (5) Good night (1424) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.

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  (518): He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around. http://tfl.nu/trrm
  Replies (2) Good night (1562) Bad night (393)

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