It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
