He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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