I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
