He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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