I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
