I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
