The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
