Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
