My friends, they love my intelligence
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize