Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
