Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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