P.S. I can't hear my feet
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
