Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
