At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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