You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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