So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize