youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
