Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize