I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
if i can run in heels then i can drive
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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