Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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