when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize