if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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