Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
