Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
