So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize
