Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
