I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
