Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls