I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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