i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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