hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Watching her eat just hurts me
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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