My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
wow bdsm is so cute
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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