As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
