You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
