Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
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