C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
