Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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