my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
