PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
