Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
She bit a glass in half.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
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