thus making me awesome and them whores
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
