We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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