So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
i am craving dick and cupcakes
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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